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Love and Health By Lauren Archer Finkelstein
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Other than the claims that red wine and chocolate are good for you (remember – all things in moderation!), have you ever thought about how the energy of love is connected to your overall health and fitness?
When we talk about love, especially around Valentine’s Day, we often think of romantic love. But the energy of love is not limited to intimate relationships. Our health is affected by how much love we can express in our lives -- by loving our selves, our communities, and our world. It’s about getting in touch with what we love and finding ways to express it.
Love is the energy that causes us to expand, to reach outward, to give of ourselves. What is it that you have to give? What parts of your self would like to grow and expand?
Since we live in an oscillatory universe (breathing in and out; day and night; ebb and flow), the expansive part of love is only half of the cycle. The other half of the cycle of love is receiving.
So here is the big question: How much love can you allow yourself to receive? How much goodness, joy, and positive energy can you allow into your life? Into your heart? Into your very being? Because guess what? You can only have what you are willing to receive.
When I think about the concept of love, and giving and receiving, I can feel it physically in the area around my heart. Do you feel it? When I ask you how much love can you allow yourself to receive, did you take a breath and feel it in your heart? It’s no coincidence that the heart is a symbol for love. It’s a place where our mental, emotional, spiritual and physical energies all connect.
Dr. Dean Ornish, who has published numerous books on heart health, had this to say about love and health: “Although there is more scientific evidence now than ever demonstrating how simple changes in diet and lifestyle may cause substantial improvements in health and well-being, one of the most powerful interventions - and often the most meaningful for me and for the people with whom I work, both colleagues and patients - is the healing power of love and intimacy and the emotional and spiritual transformation that often result from these. These include:
Dr. Ornish went on to describe how loneliness and isolation affect our health:
In short, anything that promotes a sense of isolation often leads to illness and suffering. Anything that promotes a sense of love and intimacy, connection and community is healing. Healing is a process of becoming whole. Even the words "heal" and "whole" and "holy" come from the same root.”
(If you’re experiencing loneliness in your life, please read “Relationship Myths and Facts” at the end of this article.)
Fortunately, the pendulum of modern medicine and science has begun to swing from its focus on objective, measurable, physical results, back to recognizing the subjective, hard-to-measure, intangible results. Clinical studies have confirmed over and over again that supportive human relationships have genuine healing properties. Did you know that cancer patients who participate in support groups have a higher rate of survival than those who do not? We all know that children need lots of love and nurturing to thrive. What about us busy adults? How are we allowing the energy of love into our lives?
I just led a workshop called “Attracting Right Relationships” that addressed what I believe is the key to experiencing loving relationships of any kind (intimate relationships, friendships, business relationships, etc.). It’s this simple truth – that the very process of identifying and focusing on the qualities within ourselves that we want to express in a relationship will help us to begin expressing those qualities as part of our lives, even when we’re not in a relationship. We simply become the person that we want to be as we express the love that we already have within ourselves. This process changes our energy, and changes the very frequency at which our cells are vibrating. What follows then is that others resonate with the energy of love radiating from us, and they begin to reflect it back to us. As we allow ourselves to receive their loving energy, the cycle is completed.
Love influences our health directly by changing our very energy field, and indirectly by changing our behavior. Getting in touch with what we love and want to express in our lives can be the force that gets us out of bed in the morning, inspires us to exercise, eat right, and take care of ourselves, puts a smile on our face, energizes us to do what we need to do to get through the day, and encourages us when we experience set-backs. It allows us to be kinder to others, and to serve as an inspiration to help make the world a better place.
So before you overindulge in wine and chocolate this Valentine’s Day (remember moderation is the key), spend a few moments concentrating on the love you have within you and what parts of yourself you would like to express. Focus on the energy you have to give others and the world. Think about what you love most, on your gifts and talents, passions and interests, and on offering those to others in the form of service. Notice how this changes your energy. Then watch what happens!
As always, I welcome your feedback. Please let me know if you notice a difference in your life as a result of changing your thoughts!
Wishing you love and good health,
Lauren
Lauren Archer Finkelstein, CH
P.S...I'll be having my wine and chocolate with a grain of salt!
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Relationship Myths & Facts By Lauren Archer Finkelstein
Myth: We need someone else to make us whole. Fact: We are whole within ourselves.
Myth: We must love others more than we love ourselves. Fact: We have to love ourselves in order to love others.
Myth: We need an intimate relationship in order to experience love. Fact: The world is full of people and creatures and causes that will receive our love and allow us to experience the joy of loving.
Myth: There is only so much love to give. Fact: Love is expansive – the more you love, the more capable you are of loving.
Myth: Love can hurt. Fact: Only our ego can be hurt. Our Spirit or Soul cannot be hurt by giving love, even if that love is not returned.
Myth: Unconditional love means staying with someone even if they hurt you. Fact: It is still loving to leave a relationship that causes you pain. You must love yourself enough to leave a relationship that is not working. That is the most loving thing to do for the highest good of all concerned.
Myth: There is one (and only one) perfect person out there for us. Fact: If we subscribe to this myth, we may be setting ourselves up for failure. This belief has us putting others up on a pedestal. The fact is that each of us is capable of having happy, fulfilling, loving relationships with more than one type of person. If one relationship ends, let there be room for another.
Myth: When a relationship ends, love ends. Fact: Even when a relationship ends, the love you have given has enriched your soul, and has made a difference in the world. That love has made an impact that will last forever. Think about it -- when you pass from this world, all you really take with you is love and wisdom.
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"Hide not your talents. They for use were made. What's a sundial in the shade?" -Benjamin Franklin
"Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast;
in the pool where
you least expect it, there will be a fish."
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